Welcome to Thomistic Womanhood. In today’s video, we are going to do the flip side of a previous video and we’re going to talk about what a man brings to the table? You know a lot of us women want a man in our life. But have you ever sat down and thought why, what are those universal qualities that make men so appealing and make us want one in our life so much? So in today’s video, we’re going to get into that.

Welcome to Thomistic Womanhood. Happy Thomistic Tuesday or whenever you’re watching this, in today’s video, we are going to talk about what a man brings to the table as a woman. I think it’s very important for us to identify for ourselves. Why we want a man, you know, there has been a big debate ever since the 60s and feminism, there has been the question does a woman need a man and Gloria Steinem very famously said a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. And I disagree with that. I think there are bike trails in the aquarium, but that’s just my opinion.

However, for those of you that do feel that you’re called to the married state, I made a video, I don’t know where we can pop it up one of these sides, I made a video previous where I talked about the three states of life, the three kinds of lifestyle, so you can have this is deeper than just a career or education. But one of those lifestyles is being married. And so if you feel that you’re one of the women and the majority of women are, like two-thirds of people are called to the married state, if you’re the kind of woman who’s like, yeah, I like man, I like children, and you feel you’re called to the married state, this is going to be an important video, because it’ll help you identify, what what do you want out of a man, why are you seeking a man.

So these are the six things that I feel are, you know, the universal compelling things that men have, that we women want, and that make us attracted to the kind of on like a very primal, I want to say like in a compelling way, if you’ve ever liked a guy so much, you’re like, man, there’s just something about him, like, I can’t, you can’t let go, you know, you just you feel that pull. And it’s, it’s because he probably had a few of these qualities. And the more of these qualities men have, you know, then the more attractive they’re going to be.

FINANCIAL SECURITY

So the first one is financial security. This is where he’s got a good job. Some women take it to an extreme, and they want a wealthy guy. But I would say financially secure, you know, if a guy’s got his career established, he’s bringing in some money, he can support a family at whatever standard of living you’re used to and you’re comfortable with, then that is something very compelling about men, they don’t approach careers the way we do, they’re very linear about it, you know, they set out to do something, and they just go to work day in and day out, you know, us women are a little more fluid. If you look at the careers of women, despite all the feminism and everything that we’ve had since the 60s, if you look at the US labor statistics, the majority of the top four occupations that women are doing in I looked at last year’s, I believe it was 2019, the top four were teacher, nurse, secretary and then I think it was like customer service. Rep. These are all very traditionally feminine jobs, which blew my mind, I thought I was like, so shocked when I saw that. Because with the way our media is and everything, I thought it would have been a little more, I guess, broken up, you know, but it’s not. And it’s because as women, we go for jobs that maybe allow part-time work, or they’re a little flexible, or maybe they’re seasonal, you know, or we’ll work for maybe a few years, maybe a decade, then we take time off to take care of kids. And so our careers are a little more fluid, you know, they kind of go up and down.

Whereas men are very linear. And because they’re linear, they’re able to, you know, have a lot of earning potential. And that is something we value about men because deep down on a very, like biological level, primal level, we know that men will provide for us while we have their babies, you know, men will provide for their offspring and the mother of their children. And that’s why on a kind of a deep, instinctive level, we seek out men that have resources, you know, we have some that have some sort of nowadays, you know, our economy runs on money and finances and so that’s the resource we seek out. But if we were in a barter economy, you know, back in the medieval times, When it was like they had land, you know, the land was the thing, well, if a guy had a lot of lands, you know, or, you know, back in the 1800s, oh, 40 acres in a mule, you know, when men have these resources, we naturally gravitate to that, you know, on an instinctive level, that’s the first one.

PROTECTION

The next one is protection, especially like physical protection. This is men who, you know, they can shoot guns, they can fight, they know how to protect you if you’re really afraid of identity theft, and like, this guy’s a hacker, and he knows how to do that, whoo, you’re gonna feel safe, you know. And so again, like I said, In the previous video, each one of these is like a pass, you know, to like, some high-security facility that the guy shows his boom, right this way, sir. You know, like, you’re he’s in, you know. So, again, protection that can be, you know, a big pass, you know, if you, especially if you had maybe a turbulent childhood, and maybe you were very aware of the dangerous people in the world, it’s not wild animals that we have to worry about. It’s like wild people, you know, there are still like murderers, rapists, things like that. So if you’ve got a man that knows how to fight, he knows weapons, dude, that’s going to be very attractive, that’s going to be very compelling. So physical protection.

GUIDANCE

And then the next one guidance, this, I would almost say, this is kind of a form of protection. But I would say, it may be a non-physical way, but guidance, you know, he’s a guy who’s maybe a little street smart, he knows how the world works. And, you know, he can kind of guide you. And if you’ve got a problem, like, let’s say, you have a student loan, and the creditors are hounding you, and you’re just so stressed out, you’re like, overwhelmed and at your wit’s end if you can sit there and like, cry out the story to him, and he can sit there and be like, Hmm, okay, well, have you tried calling such and such? Or have you tried? Or? And, you know, they can’t do that? Yeah, yeah, they’re bullying, you know, they can’t do that. And you’re like, really, oh, you know, if he can kind of guide you and give you life advice, or career advice, you know, if he’s got some kind of expertise in life, that he can kind of help you with, or he’s the kind of guy that is willing to listen to your problems and kind of help you sort out all the emotional inks because I think as women, we can get very overwhelmed with a problem. And our feelings can just be like, so all over the place, that sometimes it helps to tell a man because a man can kind of cut through the drama, and see what’s essential, and he can kind of redirect your focus back on that. And that is helpful and valuable. So if a man can do that, to kind of help give some guidance, that’s compelling, you know, that’s valuable.

COMPANIONSHIP

The next thing, companionship, you know, we women, we want someone to grow old with, we want a man who’s going to emotionally connect with us if he’s closing his heart off, and he’s not letting you in, all of us women, we instinctively don’t want that in a relationship, we want there to be kind of that emotional meeting of the minds where we get to see his inner world. And we can kind of talk about ours a little bit, and kind of have that verbal and emotional intimacy there. And that companionship is really important, especially when you become an old woman, your 50s and 60s, to have a man there that you live with. You spend time with somebody who cares how your day went, or just somebody if you had something funny happen, I think, forget who it was. But I think some writer said something to the effect of like, there’s nothing sadder in the world than to have no one to find a funny joke and have no one to tell it to. it’s kind of the gist of what they were saying. And it’s true. You want someone to know if something good happens, you can tell them about it. If you find a funny joke, there’s someone to tell it to you’re not alone in the world, that’s valuable. Really value that in men. So that companionship, that emotional closeness, that’s something that we find compelling.

PATERNITY

The next one, paternity. And again, this is fertility and sexuality kind of rolled into one. But it’s the way we women usually think about it. With men, there’s a bit of a split, they are very focused on sex, and they don’t always necessarily think of the fertility and the childbearing aspect. They’re just like, Hey, I just want to have a good time. Like real, real talk. But with us, women, we’re a little more holistic. If we’re thinking like, well, this guy’s hot, maybe we can have kids together. That’s kind of where our mind goes automatically. Now, again, it’s a little different. Our society I feel has kind of conditioned women to split the two. And we’re kind of taught that being a slut is empowering. And then there can be some separation here and so women aren’t always thinking of paternity when they think of sex, but in general, I would say women at our instinctive level, when we want to sleep with a guy, it’s more than that. We want to have his kids, you know, we want to be the mother of his children, we want to be two in one flesh, you know? And so that is why for a man if he’s capable of getting you pregnant, it’s not just like, is he hot? Do I want to sleep with him? Sexuality? But it’s like, Can you get me pregnant? Can we have kids together? Is that paternity possible, that’s something compelling. And that’s what we want in demand. So that is something there.

MASCULINITY

And then the final one is masculinity. Just as we talked about the effects of femininity on a man and that soothing and calming presence. with women, masculinity kind of does that for us, too. If you’ve got someone who’s like, strong and capable, and he’s loyal, and you know, he cares about you, he’s gonna stick around someone in the world that you can lean on, it’s compelling for us because it helps us feel safe. You know, it kind of lowers our anxiety in a way it helps us kind of calm down and then be sued. And I think also it helps us be free to be joyful. I think that it kind of unlocks our joyfulness, I have a friend who, when I because I knew her for years before she got married. And she’s a nice person, you know, like, I liked her. But she was just kind of serious. You know, she just didn’t really, she wasn’t mean. And she wasn’t shy, she was just kind of a very serious kind of deadpan woman. And that was just how she was well, she then met the guy who became her husband. And as they were dating, I, man, I saw such a change in her, she was a little perkier, she was a little happier, she would kind of laugh at jokes a little longer and louder. You know, there was a certain vibrancy that came back to her. And I think it was because of, you know, the man in her life. When we women, when we have a guy in our lives that we know loves us and we can rely on, I think that it allows us to relax and be happy again, you know, so with men, it kind of Sue’s them and helps some kind of calm down. But I feel like, for us women, it kind of helps us relax and be joyful and perk up again. Because life can be very hard, it can be very scary and uncertain. And I think a lot of us the older you get or the more of life you’ve been exposed to.

As women, we can kind of lose our girlish joyfulness, you know, our playfulness, because life is hard, we often have to go to jobs, we often have to pay bills, we have to do very serious, responsible, high-pressure things. And that can sometimes kind of crush the life and the joy out of us a little bit. And so when you have a man in your life, it’s almost like you can let your hair down and kind of relax and like, be happy again, because you know, that there’s someone to fall back on when you know, it’s just you. That’s a very serious prospect. And that’s kind of a scary process. I can’t talk today, it’s a scary prospect. But when you know, there’s a man there that you can rely on, you know, even if you’re in a relationship where you guys are both working, you’re both bringing in money, even still, you have that redundancy, I’m like a backup income, and it takes a huge burden off your shoulders. And so I do feel that like that masculinity, you know because men look at things differently, you know, they’re more strategic, and then us, they can notice weak points better than us. And so they’re better at, you know, protecting against them, you know, us women can often just kind of float through life. And, you know, a lot of times somebody will put one over on us, and like, we didn’t even think of it, you know, because we just were women, you know, like, we’re kind of, I don’t want to sound like too sexist, but like on a biological level, like, we’re kind of designed to, like, raise kids and be exploited by children. You know, like, we have to devote our lives to taking care of a little newborn for whatever it like Christ about. And so we’re not, we’re not as self-remembering, you know, as men are, I think, and I know, self-remembering isn’t a word, but I’m making it a word because that’s kind of what I’m getting at.

But again, when you have that masculine presence in your life and that masculine point of view, it can help you realize things that you didn’t realize before, and it helps you look at life differently. And again, I do think that it unlocks a certain joy in us you know, as long as you’ve got a good healthy man, you know, there are some relationships where the guy’s nothing but trouble and he’s drama and you never know where it’s gonna go with him or whether he loves you or not or like wires, this thing heading. And then yeah, it unlocks anything but joy, but I mean, I’m assuming that you If you’ve got a good, normal, healthy man who loves you, and he’s loyal to you, and you trust them, then yeah, that can unlock a lot of joy. And so that masculinity is really important, you know, that strength, and that, you know, that perspective and the strength and stuff, you know, knowing that, Oh, you don’t have to take care of this person, you can kind of relax and let him take care of you like, Wow, what a nice concept. Yeah, those are the things that I think are compelling about men. And again, not every guy is going to be, like, amazing, every one of these, like, you know, maybe some men, you know, take the priests, for example, you know, I’m Catholic, I’ve had priests that are very, you know, they’re very good at, like, guiding you through life, if you have a problem, especially is like, I’ve often had to move away from my family. And so I didn’t really have anybody to, like, give life advice. And sometimes I would like, tell a priest a problem and like, get advice, while they don’t have paternity. You know, they’re not, I’m not going to have kids with this priest, you know, so they don’t have everything on here, but they have masculinity, they have the guidance, you know, and that can be important to have in your life.

And again, there are other men who, you know, maybe they have a bunch of these things, but they lost their job. So they don’t have financial security at that moment, you know, there’s still something valuable, you know, especially if you know, that he’s good at, you know, you have that companionship, and he’s got guidance, you know, he’s smart enough to where, you know, he can get another job, you know. So again, these, in my opinion, these are six things that I think are compelling about men. And I really think that as women, when we have an instinctive desire to get a man that I think really what’s underneath it is the six things, we want a man that embodies these six things, and then we feel happy, and we feel like we have what we need in life. And so that’s that. Now again, just as, like I mentioned, with the video about what women bring to the table, I do want to also highlight that we all kind of have our type, we have a different like flavor of man that we like, maybe we like the geeks, you know, some of us like the really nerdy guys, others, we like, as I said, last time, the more preppy guy, you know, maybe he’s really into work, and he wears a lot of business suits, you know, and he’s not really like, he’s not really into like computers, but he’s really into like a business, and he’s always on the phone, like doing a deal or something, you know, maybe that’s your kind of guy. Or maybe you like the Cowboys, you know, maybe like those rural guys that you know, they like to hunt and fish. And, you know, they’re very, that’s your type, you know, again, we all kind of have our type of man, the certain superficial accidental qualities that we find appealing in a certain kind of guy. However, at its heart at a deeper level at a more universal level, regardless of whether he’s a cowboy, or a firefighter or a businessman, like whatever type of guy he is. If he has these underlying six things, I do think that like on a primal level, we’re going to be drawn to him.

So again, those are my thoughts. If you have any comments or questions, leave a comment below. I always check my comments. And I always try to get back to you. It might not be right away within 24 hours, but I always try to answer my comments. And yeah, if this is content you like Feel free to subscribe, hit the bell for notification, and I’ll see you next time.