Welcome to Thomistic womanhood in today’s video, we are going to answer the age old question. Why do handsome men marry plain or otherwise unattractive women? It’s a good question. You’ll watch Hollywood and you’ll see these like super hot guys. And like they’re with these women who are just like really plain, you know? And you’re like, What is he seeing her? And so we’re going to talk about that today.

This is a phenomenon that happens all the time. And it’s something that shows the power of inner beauty. A lot of these women Yeah, they don’t have outer beauty, like they’re not the supermodel you’d expect this guy to get with and that’s because when men get to these levels of success, yes, they have all the groupies. But they’ve probably tried it. And they realized how shallow a lot of these women are. And so now they understand what’s really important. And especially the second thing, if there are men of good character, you’re always gonna get a shallow guy who, no matter what the supermodel but it often shows men with character, the good kind of men you’re interested in, they often don’t care quite as much for outer beauty, which is good news, because all of us women, no matter how beautiful, we will have moments where we’re not beautiful, but this just goes to show the power of inner beauty and what is inner beauty? Well, inner beauty is your character. And how you make a guy feel how you make a guy feel is very, I mean, it’s like the unsung hero dating, I mean, really like, or heroine, if you want to say, but inner beauty is something that you have to develop yourself. It’s not something you can buy in a cream or a jar or whatever.

And I think because America in particular, and I feel like the Western world in general, because we are such a like business focused culture, we’re always trying to sell something you can sell out or beauty, you can sell makeup, you can sell like skincare creams, and lotions and potions and all kinds of stuff. And so a lot of the magazines that swim and read focus on outer beauty, because it’s what sells, these magazines have to rely on money from advertisers to subsidize the magazine costs, otherwise subscribing in the magazine would be ridiculous, they wouldn’t be able to charge a reasonable price, it would be too expensive. And so they bring in advertisers. And it’s the same with YouTube, certain beauty channels and things like that.

These girls take sponsorships from things like this, because it’s just easier to make money off of convincing women that outer beauty is the only thing that matters. And that’s not the case, that is really not the case. And when you see these handsome movie star men, or they’re really wealthy billionaires or whatever, these really powerful, super attractive men. And yet they’re getting with these, like plain women, that shows how wrong this mentality is, of oh, it’s only about physical beauty. It’s not inner beauty that is just as important. And I would argue slightly more important. And so let’s talk about what exactly inner beauty is. How do you need to make a man feel in order for him to pick you? And so basically, I would say two main things. So the number one thing is a guy needs to feel needed, he needs to feel like he’s achieving some sort of goal with you, and for a good man.

Obviously, bad men, his goal is to get you in bed, regardless of how but a good man, his goal is to make you happy. He wants to do things that make your life better and easier. And the way you make men feel needed, the way you express part of this inner beauty. And in a way that is very motivating for men is you make him feel needed, you accept his efforts to help you, if he offers to open a door for you or pay for your meal, or pull a chair out for you. Or he opens the car door for you. You accept these efforts, with a smile, and thank you, you don’t lecture him on the patriarchy or read into it and think, oh, he doesn’t think I’m capable. That’s not what that is. He’s just trying to do something nice for you. And when a man does something nice for you, you notice it, you smile and you say thank you, and that is what makes men feel needed. It’s really weird because when we think of making him feel needed, we associate it with the word You’re needy, because then men,  because a lot of men will complain and go, Oh, she’s too needy. Men are not very good at articulating emotional things.

And for men, it’s a very emotional experience for them to offer to help you, and have that help be rejected. And so in the emotion of it, they don’t know how to express that. And so they just call it like, well, well, you’re needy, you always, I try to help and it doesn’t work. That’s really what they’re trying to say, when they say, this girl is needy, she always needs something, it’s like, she’s just a bottomless pit that I just dumped efforts into, and it never goes anywhere. That’s what men mean, when they say needy, however, feeling needed, is different. That means they accomplish their goal. When a guy complains about a woman being needy, what he means is, he never feels like he accomplishes his goal of making her happy, once he satisfies one need that she has, he does something nice for her. And it’s never acknowledged, now she wants him to do another nice thing, or she ignores all the nice things he does for her. And, she wants new nice things, or different nice things, and so that’s what men mean. And so if a woman can receive successfully and graciously, and receive help from a man and do it graciously, again, with just a smile, and a thank you, you don’t have to go, oh, well, I feel bad that you’re helping me or whatever, don’t say that, because it makes men feel bad that they’re helping you. Because, again, they want you to feel good, they don’t want you to feel bad. So they get confused, when you go, Oh, I feel bad that you’re helping me because then they’re like, wait, I’m trying to make you feel better, I’m not achieving that, so they get confused. So anyways, thoughts, feeling needed. That’s a huge part of this.

The other thing is understood, a lot of these very attractive, wealthy men, most women don’t understand them, they don’t understand what it takes to get to that level of wealth, they don’t understand the work that goes into it. Because these women don’t, they don’t have any corresponding accomplishments. So their own, looking beautiful for all intensive purposes.

I mean, yes, there’s like, you got to do your makeup, you got to pick out good outfits, there is some skill that goes into it. However, 80% of it is genes, you are lucky that you just happen to have a very beautiful face. And that you happen to be in the right place at the right time during your youth and run into these guys. So a lot of these women don’t have the work ethic that a lot of wealthy men have. And so then they don’t understand, why he’s always at the office, or why this or why that and so they don’t understand him on a deep level, they don’t understand him. They don’t understand what makes a man tick, and so this is the second thing that’s really, really powerful about inner beauty is when you’re able to understand a man. And it starts by understanding all men, you need to understand, for the most part, men and women have very many similarities.

We both want to be happy. We both want to be loved and appreciated. But we interpret that we interpret, getting what we want, in different ways. And so it’s important to see how men feel appreciated, how men feel respected, how do men feel loved, it’s going to be different than how women feel loved, and how we feel appreciated. And so if you understand those differences, then you’re going to have an easier time understanding men in this way that I’m talking about. And so it’s not just, you need to understand men in general. And then that helps you understand this particular man better, and you need to understand the stresses and the worries and the things he goes through.

And, sometimes you have to learn the delicate art of when to cut a guy slack and when not to. That’s another important thing, maybe I’ll make a video about it later. But there is a fine line between being a doormat and being overbearing. And another thing that these men appreciate these successful men appreciate is when they have a woman who understands them enough to know the difference, when she knows, oh, he didn’t do that to insult me or disrespect me it really was an accident, when she knows the difference, because again, this is a fine line, you got to keep guys the line. But at the same time, you got to know when to let certain things slide. And so when a man has a woman who understands that difference, and she also understands his life and his motivations and kind of like what’s in his heart that is very powerful. And that is why a lot of these women may not see the most beautiful woman that you think this guy has access to, but they are the most inwardly beautiful.

And that’s why this guy is attracted to this woman and he has her in his life, when he could have so many other more outwardly beautiful women of inner beauty is very, very powerful. And so that’s what we talk about on this channel. You know, I talk a lot about how to develop inner beauty, that mindset that femininity, but again, you know, these wealthy men that you know, wealthy or successful or famous, you know, these men that get with plain women, they really illustrate the point I’m making there proof that looks aren’t everything, personality and inner beauty is those far in life. It really does. So anyways, I hope that’s helpful food for thought. If you have any questions or comments, feel free to leave one below and have a great day.